Been drowning myself in beach-like sounds, my mind's going haywire again, could this be a rush of blood to the southern part of my body, and if minus the bear, would i dare survive? if this means i wanluvyu do i keep on drowning myself in the same loud noises? if i dare neuroticize will i see you by my side? or is it just the way it goes, i can never fully reveal myself to you because we will never roll down the same hill together because i went up the other way. or do i just pretend i don't hear the futile futile sounds of murmurings, that smile, that taking it all in. but sometimes i cannot take it all in. N! i shout jokingly, but then again i do not know what i want yet. i could follow that same path, and kill my soul. i should've been prettily waiting and ready for domestication 101, but i dare not. i will not succumb to the idea because i have grasped my wheel a long time before i even had the idea. then again, this ain't no surfin' movie, but it ain't no sex in the city. i may be a waste of time. honestly, you may choose not to wait for me, and it's fine. nitro might just set in soon, and i'll be by your side.